How to Befriend Your Anxiety (Yes, You Read that Right!)

If anxiety were a person, most of us wouldn't exactly be swiping right. It barges in uninvited, talks way too loudly, and never seems to leave when we ask politely. But what if ~hear me out~ we stopped treating anxiety like the enemy and instead saw it as …a friend? 

Here is the thing: anxiety is a normal human emotion. Anxiety is your body’s way of saying, “Hey this matters to you!”  That's actually useful information. Maybe instead of running from it, what if we asked: What is my anxiety trying to tell me? Maybe it reminds you that you care deeply about a relationship or that the decision in front of you matters. In that sense, anxiety isn’t here to ruin your life - it’s handing you information about what's important. 

Where it gets tricky is when our mind confuses these feelings with actual danger. That’s when our sympathetic nervous system (also referred to as our “flight or fight” response) activates leaving us feeling panicky and in survival mode. Kind of like if your brain were to treat giving a presentation at work as though you are about to wrestle a bear - We have our ancestors to thank for that one!

When anxiety like this starts running the show, dictating your every move, and shrinking your world, it stops being useful. You feel stuck. That’s when we need to do something: lean into it.

I know what you’re thinking: You want me to do the thing that makes me anxious? That’s bananas. But it's true- the only way out is through. By gradually facing the things that scare us (in small carefully tailored steps) we help retrain our brain and create new neural pathways. This helps people build up courage, confidence, resilience and overtime the anxiety begins to lose its grip.

Avoidance, on the other hand, strengthens this grip. It keeps you from building relationships, chasing opportunities, and living the life we want. But when you take that first step toward conquering your fears, that is when life begins to open up in ways you never imagined.

So when anxiety comes to knock on your door, maybe don’t just slam it shut. Crack it open, peek out, and see what it is trying to tell you.